Wednesday 31 October 2012

Storming off


 
 
Shut the door gently behind you
as you leave, I shall keep
wicks and eyebrows trimmed
and let them speak
for themselves.  The year froths
sour and green,
it has nowhere to go
except where it’s been.
Except where it’s been.

 

Pluck me a few of my minds
with your own handsome hook
out of carefully thinned air
come back to a thickened loving
smoked into my hair.
Love is still tart and green
and it’s got everywhere to go
except where it’s been.
Except where it’s been.



Shared at dVerse, with wishes for all those who are braving storms tonight to come through them safe.

21 comments:

  1. I love the repetition of that one line and the fact that the year has nowhere to go except where it has been and love has everywhere to go but where it is done. Exquisite writing~!

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    1. the year repeats itself..love rarely does...thanks for reading

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  2. love it...the repetition is haunting on some level...i like the change from one to the next....smoked into my hair, love that....love has nowhere and everywhere to go...smiles.

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    1. women used to dry and perfume their hair with incense smoke :) thank you

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  3. Love is still tart and green
    and it’s got everywhere to go
    except where it’s been...love that...oh the ways of the heart...

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    1. the ways of the heart are simply wonderful..thanks for reading

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  4. Tart & green like apples, vinegar, olives - magic like life pouring forces into glass flasks of repetition here, and creating spells. Love it!

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    1. exactly like apples, vinegar, olives! thank you

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  5. Brilliant piece.

    The year froths
    sour and green,
    it has nowhere to go
    except where it’s been.

    ...I thought that couldn't be beat but then you did that last stanza. And I agree the repetition adds a haunting effect--and I love it.

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  6. This is very thought provoking. Deep, powerful and, a little dark. I love 'got nowhere to go except for where it's been.
    Lovely imagery all through this.

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  7. Oooh! It's so profound and..LOVELY!!

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  8. LOVE this! I especially like the lines about keeping "wicks and eyebrows trimmed" and "a few of your minds" - so playfully profound! The repetition really drives the point home. We have nowhere to go but forward. You can't change the past. :)

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    1. Yes, can't change it, but have different routes to take it forward into the future...thanks for reading and the feedback :)

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  9. I love it specially love is tart and green ~ Amazing writing ~

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  10. There is no repetition in the truest kind of love. Love the unfettered spirit in this piece.

    Thanks so much for your visit. Be in touch. :)

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