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My
offering for this month's prompt is another retelling of a well known tale...please note that all characters and events in this flash are totally
imaginary and any resemblance to any leaders oops, I mean persons, living or dead, is purely
coincidental!
I'm tad over the word limit, but I'm hoping you all will forgive me when I tell you I've whittled this baby down from an initial draft of over 2200, phew!
A Fine Yarn
The
truth, they said, will set you free. In this case, it did just the opposite. Abu’s
fate was sealed the moment the truth was uttered - he was 7 at the time, not
old enough to realise the benefits of lying.
The
Books of Wisdom, the Fabulists, the Clan Elders, the Keepers of the Lore - they
tell you only half the story, half the truth.
They truncate beginnings to hook the listener. Fob him off with a neat ending
where poetic justice is seen to be served. The whole truth never makes a good
tale, it’s too boring, too inconvenient, doesn’t deliver the critical mass of
dramatic punch.
You
probably know that the ruler carried on without batting an eyelid. Have you
never wondered what happened to the boy? Hasn’t it ever occurred to you to do
so?
***
The
ruler had come at a tumultuous time. The two main communities that had lived
amicably for centuries in this town were at each other’s throats. The landed
Bhumiputra had somehow been convinced that the Musafireen, a minority, were out
to ruin the larger community.
Into
this tinderbox had stepped this tiny Purvi man. He went to the Bhumiputra and
said – my home is in the east, I have no interest in your lands. Choose me and
I’ll lead you back to the glory days when seven nations bowed to us and our
ships knitted up the coastlines of the seven seas. To the Musafireen he said –
I’m a traveller like you, a stranger among the settled. Who will understand
your sufferings better? Choose me and I’ll make sure your rights and freedoms
are safeguarded. And so the communities, both the Bhumiputra as well as the Musafireen
said yes, you shall be our ruler.
But
once he was seated, he brought in councilmen from his own hometown. Neither the
Bhumiputra nor the Musafireen were prioritised. When a few of them went to air
their legitimate grievances, the Purvi snapped – be patient! - it takes time to
rectify the huge blunders of an ancient past. When their leader persisted, he
had the young man placed under arrest for obstruction of peace. More delegations
– newspapermen, entrepreneurs,
historians – met with the same fate. The jails became standing room only.
***
A
great procession was planned for the 100th National Day. A new
boulevard was to be made, complete with exotic landscaping and impressive public
buildings. Street parties would span a week, with an explosion of food and
fireworks, mountains of merchandise and memorabilia.
Kavista
and Shopnek strode into the town on the crest of the announcement. They claimed
they spun thread and wove fabric so fine, so pure, that only the virtuous could
tolerate its dazzling lightness upon their person. Only the sinless could
admire its exquisite weave.
The
Purvi forthwith ordered a magnificent suit. Rumours soon circulated about yarns
of gold more valuable than rubies and the ruler’s name worked into the pattern in
fancy calligraphy, as if he were not an ordinary mortal but the Almighty Himself.
Kavista
and Shopnek set up their workshop on the outskirts. Massive advances were given,
but they bought nothing locally. The looms could be heard early in the morning and
in the darkness beyond sunset. However, when the curious went in, all they
saw was great looms empty of either yarns or fabric. Questions were discouraged.
***
The
100th National Day dawned bright and clear. Abu rose early, peeked
out of the small window and called to his father. You promised! The father
sighed.
Abu’s
father was a master tailor with a workshop of 20 assistants. When the
festivities had been announced he had hoped for orders. Even after the grand
commission was given to total strangers he was unperturbed. After all, there
were the councilmen to dress too, and their families, the rich and famous. But as
time ticked on no commissions came his way, not even a bunting.
***
A
hundred white horses, caparisoned in red and gold, came first - the clip-clop
of their hooves perfectly harmonised, the sun glinting off the metal of their
riders’ weapons. Ten guards marched on
both sides of the special chariot, the flawlessly matched black stallions
moving at a slow trot. The ruler stood and waved to the crowds with both hands
alternately, like he was semaphoring some message. About twenty feet behind
four pageboys followed, their hands all at the same level holding onto
something that appeared to have spilled over from the chariot - Abu screwed up
his eyes but couldn’t see clearly, was it a cape? a train? Whichever way he tried, he couldn’t make out
the pattern, or the colour, or anything else.
When
the horses drew closer, Abu saw that the
pageboys’ hands were clutching thin air. Father, look, there’s nothing, he’s
not wearing a stitch! I can see everything!
The
father said hush! Too late. The crowd around them had heard, had already split into two.
One
group shouted yes, there’s nothing, this is the biggest con that ever was!
The
other shouted back louder, swearing the ruler was wearing the most exquisitely
worked fabrics. The boy’s a liar and a troublemaker! - stirring things up on behalf
of disgruntled adults. Clearly, what else could you expect? The father’s a
tailor, isn’t he? Come to vent, what else?
It
soon spiralled into a full-fledged brawl. Abu stood bewildered as hefty men
descended on his father and pummelled the poor man. The melee spilled over onto
the boulevard, just in front of the ruler’s vehicle.
The
ruler stood impassive through it all. The guards had the crowd under control in
a while. The Purvi went on, his tiny frame held very straight, his face as inscrutable
as before, his arms rising and falling in his strange semaphore-like waving.
Abu still couldn’t see any kind of clothes on him.
Four
horsemen from behind the chariot fell away onto the grassy verge. Where’s the
young lad? Where’s he? they called. The crowds quickly pointed to Abu and his
roughed-up father.
You’re
under arrest, the uniformed men said. Abu’s father said, he’s only 7 huzoor, just
a boy! So they said no, it was the tailor they were arresting. For obstructing
the National Day celebrations, jeopardising the ruler’s security. The boy would
go to a juvenile home.
***
So
the tailor rotted in prison for the next umpteen years as an undertrial. Abu
was sent to a remedial home, let out only after 18. The ruler was still seated,
the town was still edgy and polarised, no-one would give Abu an honest job for
fear of giving offence. He took to crime
and fetched up in prison like his father, on solidly real charges this time.
The truth never did set him free. The more he stuck to it, the deeper he worked
himself into a trap.
And
what of Kavista and Shopnek? They got the Mumtaz Designer Award and were appointed
the official clothiers to the ruler. You can still hear their looms going in
the workshop on the outskirts of the town.
~*~*~
WC - 1181
FCA
Bhumiputra - from Sanskrit, bhumi = land, putra = son(s)
Musafireen - from Arabic, safar = journey, musafir = traveller, pl musafireen
Purvi - from Sanskrit, Purva = East, Purvi = from the East, Easterner
huzoor = sir
I have omitted inverted commas/quotation marks for the dialogues above, so as to 'age' the narrative and blur the exact setting. I'd value your feedback on it. Did it work for you? Did you find it irritating? Did it achieve its purpose? Thank you as always for reading and critiquing.
Read the other entries here.
I liked this tale inspired by The Emperor's New Clothes, within a different cultural context, and with a more pessimistic ending. I tend to believe your ending would be more realistic than what Hans Christian Andersen visualized in his retelling of this tale. So yes, it worked for me.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the feedback! There's not much scope for optimism right now, but I remain positive. The world will find its balance in the long term.
DeleteWonderfully done, Nila. You descriptions are exquisite. Poor Abu and his father. The truth didn't help at all.
ReplyDeleteQuestions were discouraged = my favourite line. It says so much!
Questions are being discouraged in so many different societies right now. Thanks, Jemi.
DeleteOh yes. It worked. The more things change...
ReplyDeleteAnd sadly it toooo often is all of the Abu's and their fathers who pay the price.
Thank you. It's always the ones who are least able to afford it that are made to pay, sadly.
DeleteGreat story, Nila. Telling the truth could be a perilous endeavor. Especially in totalitarian societies, but not only in them. Democracies too suffer from this malady. Sometimes it seems that the Freedom of Speech maxim only applies to those who speak with the majority. If you dare to open your mouth and express the unpopular or 'politically incorrect' opinions, you can be sure of unpleasant repercussions. Safer to keep your mouth shut.
ReplyDeleteLots of flawed democracies around where freedoms and rights are lip service only. Thanks, Olga.
DeleteYou have a beautiful writing style. I love your imagery--fresh and captivating.
ReplyDeleteThank you, glad you enjoyed the flash.
DeleteHari OM
ReplyDeleteI read this not with WEP eyes, but as an adopted Indian... and greatly appreciated the reframing of this old tale to relate the current travesty. Also I offer up a prayer that it is not years before all can see the naked truth. YAM xx
Travesty is right. Thank you Yamini, for your prayers. We really need them. <3
DeleteSo many 'big lies' and too many more who spout them, support, and sadly die for them. Great retelling!
ReplyDeleteFar too many! Misinformation has become the fifth horseman..
DeleteHi Nila - an interesting take on the old fairy tale - yours probably came before ... but like the clothes there's nothing to see ... except the way humans work selfishly ... one day I hope the people will learn to think for themselves and overcome, without blood being spilt.
ReplyDeleteNila - I always enjoy reading your thoughts and stories ... so much for us to think about from your words ... all the best - Hilary
Thank you, Hilary. Glad you enjoyed the story. I too hope we will learn our lesson from this time of hardship - think for ourselves and make a better future.
DeleteHi,
ReplyDeleteI have to admit this story is so sad, I could have cried. My heart went out to Abu and his father.
Shalom aleichem
It is tragic, the erosion of freedoms and the rising levels of injustice in the world.
DeleteIndeed an excellent re-telling with your clever way with words. You spun a tale that we COULD see about lies and untruths - the big con. Well done, with an old world flavor.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Joanne. Glad you enjoyed reading.
DeleteHi Nilanjana. A very clever take and pretty relevant to our times. Who wants to hear the truth and well, who likes to be questioned. Nobody, really!
ReplyDeleteSee no truth, hear no truth, speak no truth seems to be the general philosophy of a certain segment of society.
DeletePoor Abu and his father. At times you very subtly point out that the truth didn't help at all. Isn't that the way in totalitarian societies, but not just those. There seems to be a disease creep in most societies. Sadly. Questions are discouraged...of course. Great retelling. I love your retellings. And your style is exquisite as always.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how many thousands are imprisoned simply because they disagree with their rulers. It's outrageous and heartbreaking at the same time.
DeleteWhat a great take on an old story Nila. Beautifully written and with a pathos!... Very sad and totally believable. Well done.
ReplyDeleteCarole
Thank you, Carole.
DeleteA tale spun with great style, a steady flow, and vivid imagery. Well done, Nilanjana.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Christopher. Glad you liked it.
DeleteYou truly are a master story teller. I wish I could say such an outcome is unbelievable, but it truly isn't. It's amazing how many people are willing to cling to an obvious lie, so much so that they begin to believe it themselves.
ReplyDeleteIt's scary mind boggling how a huge number of people let themselves be conned into believing a lie and being so easily manipulated.
DeleteThanks Nilanjana for this lovely short fiction. I was completely taken by the atmosphere and ‘aging’ technique….however I find that dialogue in punctuated form does lighten the rhythm of a story and makes it more immediate and engaging. Sadly, speaking up is sometimes contentious….and more and more in these troubled times…we will soon be back in the Middle Ages at this rate.
ReplyDeleteYes, that's what it looks like - regressing back to the middle ages. Thank you for the specific feedback re the quote marks, appreciate it.
DeleteFollow or be silenced. Great use of the prompt in a way all readers who know the tale can agree with. Well written.
ReplyDeleteThe clamp down on dissent has been relentless, rights being steadily eroded. An explosion of undemocratic practices have become routine. Disturbing. Thanks for the feedback.
DeleteCleverly wrought Nilanjana. It did work for me. I loved it. The absence of inverted commas did have the effect of ageing the setting. I loved all your half hidden references to a certain leader. Superb.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kalpana for the specific feedback re inv commas. Much appreciated. Glad you enjoyed the flash! and that the references worked as well :)
DeleteToo young to know the benefits of lying...
ReplyDeleteIt's funny how the "right" thing tends to be more obvious to children.
Sometimes, the right thing is easier to get to with a straight forward, uncomplicated, baggage free brain of a child than the convoluted thinking of adults.
Delete