Saturday, 23 March 2013

Romantic Friday Writers March Challenge





This month the challenge over at Romantic Friday Writers is designed as a tribute to the Roman god Mars, patron of war and agriculture.  Mars is a cold and impersonal god, caring more for the battle than its outcome, which makes perfect sense to me because if a god ever cared for the outcomes, there would  never be any wars in the first place.  Read more about the challenge here.

The trigger for me was the word self-sacrifice. Combine that with deceit and romance, and immediately an enticing picture of old fortress ruins with their colourful legends comes to mind.  May I just add that this here tale is completely imaginary, no Dwijen or his lady love exist, at least not to my knowledge.


In Arabic, there was/is a tradition of monorhyme in poetry, and I have always wanted to try it. So, I sat myself down and this is what happened, not exactly monorhyme, but as close as I got.  Way over the word limit, but what's an extra hundred between poets/writers? :) Hope you enjoy it!




I am happy to report that this story in verse has got selected for publication, and therefore the content can't be available here.


 
 
 
 
WC - 1086
FCA
 
 
 
Read the other awesome entries here:
 
1. Denise Covey 5. J.L. Campbell 9. Denise Covey Direct LInk
2. Anna of Annas Adornments 6. Yolanda Renee 10. Donna Hole
3. Nilanjana Bose 7. Dawn Embers 11. Roland Yeomans
4. Charmaine Clancy - dream... write... publish 8. Sally






(Submissions close in 2d 3h 48m)
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24 comments:

  1. What a beautiful tale and made all the more poignant by your words in poetry.

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    1. Thank you, KayEm! Good to see you. So glad you enjoyed the poetry.

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  2. Sad, sad tale. Betrayal is the worst, of King, of sister, of love.

    Beautifully written! I really enjoy reading it and your description -- so well done from the first sentence of your intro to the end!

    So fitting "winter is gone, but spring has not begun" says so much, for the season, for life, for love!

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    1. So difficult to know who exactly to betray, isn't it? :) and I am hearing that the weather in your parts has gone back to winter mode. Thanks for reading and the feedback, pleased you enjoyed it.

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  3. I adored this Nilanjana. As you say, what's a few extra words between poets/writers? Love the language, but the tale is so spooky. Especially love the second-last stanza. Very creepy. Your experiment was a rip-roaring success. Pen more after this style!

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    1. Thank you Denise. So pleased that the experiment worked! And I could have complied with the word limit by knocking a stanza off (in fact, the second last was my target!) but in the end just left it as it was in the first draft.

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  4. You rocked this poetry form Nila. Seriously; I'm not a poet and I was riveted to every word. The twist of love of king and country over romantic love made this so much more poignant to me. You captured the heart of Mars. Beautifully awesome.

    Thanks for participating with RFW this month Nila.

    ........dhole

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    1. I always find the challenges at RFW absorbing, love to participate in them. And you are absolutely right that internal battles are so much harder than external ones, happy you liked the form. Many thanks for your support here and elsewhere.

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  5. A ghost story in a poem, very interesting!

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  6. Long one with good continuity. Well written.

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    1. Thank you for the visit and the feedback.

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  7. wow....really nice development int eh story...and very cool you told it in verse as well...love the intimacy..lines between ecstasy and agony get blurred...ah, aint that true...but even more than that is where you took it as well...testing loyalties...

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    1. Worst battles possible..thanks for being here, appreciate it truly!

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  8. Monday March25th, 2013
    Hi Nilanjana,
    Thank you for reading my post. This poem sounds interesting, but I need some more time to read it fully. I'll be back!
    Best wishes,
    Anna

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  9. Loved it. Full of emotions.
    Mira

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  10. I like all the descriptive detail in this piece. Passion of Mars is a brilliant choice!

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    1. Thank you...for the visit and for making that conection!

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  11. An epic tale told beautifully, Nilanjana. Congrats for winning featured writer at RFW. Well deserved. Hope you are well.

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    1. Hi Adura, and many thanks! Look forward to getting together next month at RFW.

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