If I were called in to choose my own disease,
I'd choose a certain yearning of the blood
to tattoo itself into textures of trees
to lie down in and melt into the mud.
I'd choose the shapes of silence between the stars
tuck them into crooks of nerves and mainsprings
and if you peeled back the skin at ribs and shoulders
you'd find the pulsing starshine in their linings.
Sadly, much as I would prefer the above romantic diseases, I am ill with far more mundane stuff. Not been myself for days and days, and thoroughly fed-up of being a patient. Patience as you know is so not my forte. :) My respects once again to those who suffer chronic diseases with grace and fortitude, and that includes my mother. I don't know how they do it.
Hope to be back next week. Meanwhile, stay well and happy!
I'm sorry you've been ill for so long! Prayers for full recovery and soon.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I need every one of them.
DeleteC'mon Nil cheer up! A happy mind will translate into speedy recovery. That's what makes chronic disease patients keep their chin up! Lovely read!
ReplyDeleteHey Rina! That does cheer me up enormously :)
DeleteI am so sorry to hear that you are unwell. I hope you get much, much better quickly.
ReplyDeleteLove the images you gave us though. I would like to become a tree. Indeed when I die I hope to feed a tree.
And the thing about chronic illness is that we have no choice. Accept it or not, it remains. And bewailing it takes energy most of us do not have to spare.
Thank you for your wishes, EC, much valued. There's something primal in each one of us that wants to connect to trees/nature in some way..
DeleteFor many of us that want is a need.
DeleteNila, I'm so sorry you're not well. Those of us who rarely get ill are bad patients I find. I do hope very soon you are back to your old self. At least you got a great poem out of it! '...tattoo itself into textures of trees...' indeed.
ReplyDeleteDenise :-)
Thanks, Denise. I do think a little whingeing has some medicinal value :-) So true about people who are rarely ill making terrible patients!
DeleteHi Nila - it's so frustrating being ill, when you can't seem to work out what's going on - I do hope life improves for you ... take care and with hugs ... all the very best this weekend. Hilary
ReplyDeleteYeah, that waiting in the dark part is the worst bit for sure, but thankfully that's over now. Thanks so much Hilary and hugs back to you. Have a great weekend travelling.
DeleteSo sorry to read you've been ill, but I totally relate to the exasperation of the mundane and the level of whining it conjures. But yes, a little goes a long way. Feel better quickly!
ReplyDelete