This post’s late because all day yesterday
I travelled between my homeland and home -
curried cubed fish and three small golap jaam
were served for lunch in a neat airline tray;
though deboned fish isn’t the Bengali way
it was still festive, throwback to the drums
still being played at the marquees. I heard them
at 30,000 ft somewhere near Bombay.
All day yesterday I travelled between
being a mother and a daughter, a parent
to parents and child. On my in-flight screen
old Hindi films spooled out dramatic events,
a three-hour ten-minute stopover meantthinking what 'mother' has now come to mean.
Flying certainly makes you feel in between.ReplyDelete
Parent means meany things, including a child parenting a parent.
It's taken me sometime to figure that one out...Delete
Hugs. That shift in definition can be confronting and scary.ReplyDelete
It's a bit disorienting. Hugs back.Delete
You're doing your best. Take comfort in thisReplyDelete
I suppose...that's all one can do. Thanks for being here.Delete
Parenting parents is tough - been there, doing it :)ReplyDelete
A shade more difficult than parenting a child :)Delete
Thanks Nila for the mention of the festive gulab jamun ... sorry you had to leave the day of the festival ... but I'm sure family life is similar. Parenting ... I have no children, but my mother remarked that I was now looking after her - it's a similar feat ... a precious task, an honour to be trusted by a parent who no longer can help herself ...ReplyDelete
Thank goodness your husband and children can release you for a period - distance is so difficult ... but you are doing what you can in the circumstances - and that's the way it is ... adjusting is everything ... exhausting and disorienting as you mention ...
With many thoughts and blessings for both families - Hilary
Thank you Hilary for your kind thoughts and blessings, much needed..it is indeed a precious task though a bit difficult to manage at a remove of a few thousand miles...clones would be super helpful!Delete
I'm sure you're more than capable to handle the task at hand.ReplyDelete
I hope I am...Delete
I understand. I just flew back to TX from PA - visited/cared for my Dad. He's become a bit of a petulant child. Your poem resonated with me.ReplyDelete
My best wishes and thoughts for your Dad and yourself. Glad you liked the poem.Delete
Parenting our parents is hard work in every sense. And then the wheel will keep turning and before we know it, our children will be parenting us.ReplyDelete
Yup, so they will...but the children parenting us is a scary thought right now :)Delete
I love travel, but I love being home too. It's so nice being able to return to normal and the routine after the insanity of life.ReplyDelete
I love travel too, but not for sickness...prefer travelling when everyone around is hale and hearty generally...thanks for stopping by!Delete
Hello Nila. I've caught up with this and your previous post from India now. I'm not sure what you mean by the change in your relations with your mother... It's a poignant time when parents aren't well. Both of mine have passed, sadly, but they're still with me in spirit every day.ReplyDelete
Thanks, Denise. My mother and I have been 'mothering' each other for many years now. Started in my twenties when she was diagnosed with cancer, though didn't exactly figure it out then :)Delete
It's beyond stressful when a parent is ill, and distance compounds the helplessness. Happy to say my mum is now back home and recovering..